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Toward Wholeness Blog

While you were living…the unconscious nature of transformation


After a week of meetings in Germany with Torchbearers Missionary Fellowship, my wife and I made our way to

Schladming for a little bit of rest before I head up to England for a week of speaking at Capernwray Hall.   The week is a break in the midst of what has been a very busy time, both at home and on the road.

Because I’m here without obligations or responsibilities, I hadn’t anticipated that the Spring Bible School students would still be here, but as it turns out, today is their last day.  What this means is that they’ll spend their morning worshiping, praying, and sharing together the things God has taught them during their time here.

Though I don’t know them at all, Donna and I sneak in the back to listen just a bit and it’s there, in that space, that I remember my time here twenty years ago, in spring school 1995.   That spring I spent my free time filling out an application for the role of senior pastor at Bethany Community Church in Seattle because, after speaking there for a week earlier in the spring, I’d been asked to apply for the job, a job I wasn’t sure I wanted, but was certain I didn’t want to miss, if it was God’s will.  I remember writing answers to questions, printing the whole thing and faxing it to the church office in Seattle, fairly convinced that my lack of large church experience (I was leading a house church at the time) would disqualify me from consideration anyway.

I was wrong, of course, as I often am when I presume to know the ways and mind of God.  By the fall of that same year, Donna and I were packing up our things for a move to Seattle where, on December 1st, we began our five year commitment to the big church of 300 in the big city of Seattle.  After a year, 300 had grown to 225.  After five years though, we said no to some other opportunities, convinced that there was another chapter for us in Seattle and Bethany.

Five years has become twenty.  225 people have become 3500 people.  One location has become six.  And all of this represents the faithfulness of God in changing one life at a time, one step at a time.  The church in Seattle has changed profoundly.

And here in Austria?  New facilities.  New staff.  New leaders.  Larger Bible Schools.  A sailing ministry in Greece.  Yes… God’s been at work here too, and all the outward signs are but the most visible outward displays representing countless changed lives, now scattered throughout the world like so much life giving seed, making Jesus visible.  This space has also been a place of change.

All these thoughts are swirling as I run through the mist hanging in the alps this morning.  I’m mindful that the church I lead is changing in good ways, as is this school in Austria.  New leaders.  New locations.  Changed lives.  It’s good stuff!  So I ponder, as the rain falls – “What practices and attitudes help create positive changes?” Though there are many, these ___ seem foundational:

I.  Vertical Connection –  Jesus said it:  “Abide in me and you’ll bear much fruit”  Those eight simple words are at the core of the work God wants to do in the world.  This is because God’s desire is to express nothing less than the life of Christ through the likes of you and me.  When it works, his joy, peace, power, wisdom, love, patience, generosity, forgiveness and hope are poured out through us, watering thirsty souls.

Foundational as this is, it is also the most elusive piece of the puzzle for many.  We’re raised to believe that we have what it takes to make a grand difference in the world, and that with enough planning and projects, metrics and media, goals and objectives, we’ll reach the promised land of fulfilled vision, or meaningful work, or perfect children.

Um, no.  That’s not going to happen.  To the contrary, the story that God will write through any of us will, in the end, declare that it’s those who are mindful of their own thirst and need for the reality of Christ that God will use to express God’s life to the world.

Our thirst for God and for the enjoyment of Christ’s real presence in our lives are the most important realities we can pursue and experience.  They’re as vital as air and water, critical resources for the kind of life Jesus invites us to live.

II.  Patient Expectation –  My techno watch tells me two things while I’m running this morning.  First, it confirms the glad news that I’m running at pace that keeps heart happily ticking along between 130 and 140 beats per minutes, sort of a sweet spot for my running.  Second, I lean the even better news that I’m travelling faster in this same sweet spot now than I was last summer when I was here.  Same heart rate; faster running!  How did that happen?

Gradually.  In his book about training for alpine adventures, Mark Twight introduces the acronym: TINSTAAFL, which means “There is no such thing as a free lunch”  It’s his way of saying that nobody can compress the time it takes to get in shape for a big climb, thinking that a few cross fit sessions where your heart pumps and your muscles ache and you feel like throwing up will never be able to do the job.  “Gradualness is the only way aerobic adaptation is gained” is the essence of what he says.

I just focus on staying between 130 and 140.  It’s my body, and the magic of health and exercise that make me faster.  My own attempt to go faster nearly two years ago resulted in a strained Achilles, the result of which was a total ban on running for about a month.  Faster?  My attempts at self improvement were in the toilet.  It was then that my physical therapist said, “you’re going too fast – keep your pulse under 135”  My first days on my urban running path were an exercise in humility.  As person after person passed me, I wanted to shout, “I’m faster than this!!” but I kept quiet and kept doing my turtle thing.

Slowly faster.   I’m  convinced that those who want to look more like Jesus need to find out what it is that Jesus wants us to actually DO, and what he promises to do in response.  This is where my II Corinthians 3:16-18 favorite stuff comes in.   That’s where I’m told to “behold his glory” and that if I do that, I will be transformed, slowly, yet relentlessly, ‘from glory to glory’ – so that I look more like Jesus.  Little by little, hope will evict despair, light will overcome darkness, love will overwhelm hate, and the whole complex thing that is your personality will be infused with a hope, quiet confidence, and joy that I can’t be made in any self improvement program any more than the guys who make potato chips can fabricate, a butterfly.

Our transformation, you see, is divine handiwork.  We are his workmanship, we’re told.  So we can all just relax bit, drop our program of self-branding and building a following, stop worrying about what the other moms think of our recipes and living rooms, and simply make getting to know Jesus as a friend our chief aim in life.  Then he’ll do the changing while we focus on other stuff, just like my body produces whatever it makes so that i run faster now than a year ago, not because I’m trying to run faster, but because I’m showing up more consistently.

No single devotional, or utterance of gratitude to God for a sunrise, or receptivity to what Jesus is saying through that difficult person – none of these things are deal breakers.  The sky rarely opens up and pours out fire, or doves.  Instead, like mitochondria multiplying in response to the stress of running, little unseen things are happening, just because we keep showing up.

Then one day, we open our eyes and realize that, in spite of ourselves, the years have given us more joy, more contentment, and more grace, than we’d every have hoped, surely more than we deserve.  When that happens we’ll not only thank God for the work God has done, we’ll realize it happened in spite of ourselves, while we were living.

O Lord Christ…

You promise to change us, starting with the gift of rest, if we’ll just relax and learn of you.  But we’re religionists, busy, striving, making ourselves holy for you, or effective for you, or at least less guilty in hopes you won’t destroy.  Forgive us Lord, for the image we’ve made of you is an idol, and our souls are parched because of it.  Staring now, we pray, may you be our pursuit, our joy, our companion.  Teach us this, so that we’ll keep seeking you… and then we’ll simply thank you that, without a lot of perception on our part, the deepest changes of our soul needs will ripen.  We’ll wake up some day, see the changes, and give thanks. 

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